passions of a painting grandmother

2010-09-04T08:59:00.000-07:00

This blog is such a fulfilling way for me to get my thoughts out....I haven't felt like writing in earnest in such a long time. I am beginning to feel again the little nudges inside that words make when they want to be expressed. But most of all, I am feeling the need to put into words the ideas and convictions that are swirling around and filling increasing amounts of time in my head.

The long and short of it is this. I am not getting any younger. I know now what I did not know when I was much younger--mainly that I will not live forever and want to make choices with my time and my life that mean something for eternity, for others, for things that really matter.
I truly want to go out strong in making a difference somehow. Today I heard a friend say, "We are all going to get tired, I want to get tired over something worthy of getting tired over." That is wonderfully put.
I am coming to realize that the enemy of our soul has one amazingly effective strategy that is keeping countless people from doing what they were called to do. That strategy is nothing more than the 'good' task of keeping us constantly striving "to be better." It is an exhausting and impossible job that seems so worthwhile that we are blinded to the heart of God's will for us-namely, forgetting ourselves and getting on with bettering the lives of every one else.
I feel new "marching orders" are coming for a new season and hopefully I will recognize them for I am pretty sure they won't look familiar or feel comfortable. Stretching one's horizons is a specialty of God's.
More than anything, I want to be about what He is about, no matter how insignificant it may look to me. His economy is vastly different than ours. I think I would see and hear more clearly if I walked around on my hands, seeing everything upside down, right side up.
A precious friend reminded me this morning of the prayer of all prayers, "the prayer that never fails, Thy will be done."
ever grateful for that

Season's end

2010-09-03T07:18:00.000-07:00

Well, summer is almost over--actually, it is over when you see big yellow school buses picking up children at the street corner and begin to see the piles of tomatoes dwindling at the farm stands. Oh, the HORROR of dwindling tomatoes.! To me, tomatoes are the only redeeming thing about summer--no, that is not true. It's humid steamy days and constant mosquito bites are redeemed by fresh corn, green beans, bright peppers, and fresh produce of every kind. Of course, I left out hummingbirds, sweet iced tea, never ending jumps off the dock into the lake, crickets at night, giant blossoms on my moon vine opening at dusk, cold suppers, watching the last of daylight every evening from my bed, and many other lovely aspects of the season.
I guess my love affair with fall is making me wish the last vestiges of summer to be on their way. I have been admiring my perfectly seasoned wood pile since April, anticipating that first day that will be cold enough for a fire.
I know I shouldn't wish away a single day. I just don't "do hot" very well, never have, and never will. I look each day much like my end of the season plants--a little droopy and sick of the heat.
I am in Mass. with our daughter Clare for a couple of weeks, and I am certainly seeing those hints of Fall that make me want to shout. We drove through the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia and the rolling hills of the Amish countryside in Pennsylvania thrilling at the beauty and timeless hope seen in the harvested fields. So many deep truths are tied into harvest, such a poignant time for so many people who have labored so long for this season.

Robert Lewis Stevenson said, "Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds that you plant." Whether summer, fall, winter or spring, that is a wonderful way to live.
ever grateful for that

a morning well spent

2010-07-28T09:42:00.000-07:00

I have been honored to spend the morning with a lovely young woman who has been a widow for a year. As she sat on my sofa and spilled out her mending heart, over and over there was a phrase I wanted to say to her, but refrained . Sharing the fears, the trials, the overwhelming 'aloneness' of a now single mom, I saw what she could not see. I saw her deep down strength and her honest but sometimes questioning faith holding her, binding her to her Savior with cords much stronger than she felt.
I saw my Clare a year down the road, saw with hope a fellow traveler who has also been forced to walk a very difficult path with no map and no seeming end, yet still putting one foot in front of the other keeping her eyes on the only compass there is in such a 'fog' as she called it--the person of Jesus, who IS our compass. Isn't He the only one who knows where He is leading us, and why?

Its funny how wonderful and appropriate children's literature can be in very grown up times. I wanted to say to her what Christopher Robin said to Winnie when Christopher had to go away. His words seemed so appropriate today. Words that I believe are true of all of us if we belong to Him. It is a paraphrase of "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

"If ever there is a tomorrow when we are not together, there is something you must always remember--you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think, but the most important thing is, even if we are apart, I'll always be with you."

I refrained from saying it for the same reason I refrain from saying it to Clare.
Now may not be the time-their pain, their grief, and their loss is too big to throw in quotes, and scriptures-however true. They must feel what they feel. Telling someone who feels so weak how 'strong' they are, puts a lot of pressure on a wounded soul. In God's good time and good grace, He will show them both whatever they need to know about Himself and the safe place He has for them and their children, yes, and even the place of joy they think they will never know again.
ever grateful for that

home again,home again, without the jiggedy jig

2010-07-20T07:06:00.000-07:00

Oh, home. Most of my blogs in the past have been about how I love home. Home, with its comforts, "comfortableness", peace and its unique power to energize. I did find these same wonderful qualities awaiting us after such a long time away, but something is different. I am different. Places and their charms don't hold the same power for me. I do not think I will ever see my home as I always have. I know now, in a way I have never been able to grasp before, that the home that is truly mine, that I was created for, doesn't exist here on this planet.

Barry, our dear son-in-law, died on July 4th. For the last 5 weeks, Phil and I have been at Clare and Barry's home, doing whatever we could to ease the workload for Clare as she cared for, loved, and helped to make Barry's home-going as pain free as possible.

Words can't contain what this journey is teaching me. I'll have to marinate for a while in these rich lessons so that I may attempt to sort them out and share them. I do know that to go to the highest places with God, you have to go to the lowest places. To overcome pain, you have to embrace pain, and to overcome fear, you let God take you to those places you fear most, and let go and watch Him go to battle for you. All this new revelation comes from a person who has a PHD in Pain avoidance. No one has been more expert at keeping pain at bay than moi! The fruit of that avoidance has been a shallow understanding of the immense power of God's love and the instant connection available to me if I won't be so afraid of being broken.
It has been said of God's kingdom that it is an upside down one. RIGHT! Throw out all your preconceived certainties about being a child of God, hold on to your big hat, one that fits a big head if you have one like mine, and dare to let God do whatever He needs to do to show you His paths to joy...the "real McCoy" joy. Let me interject here that joy and happiness are two completely different animals.

I don't know much anymore. Phil always says now, "if there is one thing I know, it is that I don't know." I get it. But the one thing we are certain of now more than any other time in our lives, is that "love never fails." Opinions fail, head knowledge fails, even experience can't be banked on. But God, and God alone, does not disappoint when He is your only source of trust.
more later, maybe not....
grateful for the choice

tender mercy

2010-06-30T05:23:00.000-07:00

I do not have words adequate enough to explain the holiness and the sadness and the heart-hope of watching a precious family member slowly go from this life to the next.
Words fail when emotions are so varied, moment by moment. I know one thing for sure though, God is near, and He goes before us, He goes before Barry and we are not traveling this journey by ourselves.

Romans 8: 35-39 says:

"Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine or nakedness, or peril or sword?...yet in all things we are more than conquerors through Him who loves us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nt things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created things, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
ever grateful for that!

leaving soon

2010-06-08T09:59:00.000-07:00

Well, faithful few, soon I will be going to Mass. to stay with Clare, Barry and boys for long while. It seems a little strange watering my garden knowing I won't be here to see it come to fruition, yet I will have Clare's garden to enjoy and to watch unfold. I won't be here cooking for my "best eater" but I will have a house full of good eaters to satisfy. I can watch Clare's birds just outside her window, leaving mine here for Phil to enjoy. I'll watch Clare's chipmunks do their damage on her flower beds instead of watching them here, digging up my bulbs and hiding them under our porch sofa cushions!
Clare was distressed, thinking I was leaving "my life here", putting "my life on hold", and staying away so long. It was such a beautiful and peaceful revelation to my spirit to be able to say, "I am not putting my life on hold, this IS my life!" Whatever God puts before us each day, whatever unique way He wants us to serve Him, that is our real life. I was telling someone the other day in the midst of her mundane, everyday service to her family, "It may not look like a Billy Graham crusade over there to you, but it is the same to God."

So, I head North for a season of service and blessing. I fully anticipate it to be one of the hardest and most painful trips of my life, and to be honest, I don't feel very adequate for the job, and yet I know without a shadow of a doubt, it will be a time of deep fellowship with Jesus, identifying with Him in many ways, watching Him pour out His unfailing love upon our family in our utter dependence upon Him, and just being with them, walking along side and sharing their pain.

I was reading yesterday a lovely and true statement from Dear Jesus, one of my daily devotionals. It read, "But I (Jesus) have showered you with humble, rarely sought gifts; neediness and weaknesses. These gifts, properly received and used, help make My ways known on earth."
Isn't that a redeeming and wonderful way to navigate through hard places?
Love to all, I may not have time to write for a while, but, as they say, "I'll be back!"
ever grateful for that

Saturday ramblings....

2010-05-29T14:08:00.000-07:00

It's kind of weird writing to no one, really. I get an occasional comment, from close friends, but my most faithful comment givers are the guys selling porn on the internet. I guess they didn't really get the post about trading in your sin and guilt for peace and joy. They probably had a great big laugh and think that I get mad when they continually comment. Well, I don't. I'm just delighted they like to read about birds in my bird bath, sunlight traveling around the rooms in our house, my favorite aprons, and the pain in my heart caused by the terminal illness of our precious son-in-law. I hope they read about the hope that is there too, hope put there by the promise of life eternal if you belong to the family of God. I just ask one thing of this bunch....that they write their comments in English. If I could give them the great news of the Gospel of Jesus Christ in their language, I would.

I have a favorite person whose quotes set me on fire when I was much younger. Her name is Sister Mary Corita. Today I ran across a little journal where I had written many of them down. I will close with a few choice ones:

"To believe in God is to die and not be embarrassed."
"To believe in God is to get high on love enough to look down at your loneliness and forget it forever!"
"To believe in God is more than I need to make believing more than making believe."

Oh! I love this one from God:
"God is dead."--Nietzsche
"Nietzsche is dead." --God

ever grateful for eternal life in Christ Jesus

bird bathing

2010-04-28T11:40:00.000-07:00

What is it about a bird taking a good, vigorous, extra splashy bath in our fountain that perks me up no matter what circumstance I am in? All that wiggling and vibrating serve as a very effective little sprinkler system, watering flowers and plants all around. I have a friend who's fountain inspired mine, and birds line up there for a bath like cars in a car wash line! That is my goal, to have them line up for their turn. So far, Robins and Brown Thrashers top the list of daily bathers. Sparrows love it and take the longest to finish their business. I am waiting for a chickadee to find the perfect little rock in it to perch upon and stop my heart (not permanently of course.)
God does exactly what He says He does in providing for even the birds, knowing what they need without them asking. Could I trust with such abandon as a little bird?

A sad phone call put me into a 'what-if' state of mind this morning. Watching the birds has been comforting to me---watching them stay in the moment, enjoying what is put before them without anxiety over tomorrow. Living like that would bring a "beautiful simplicity to my life; a time for everything, and everything in its time." Is what I am worrying about part of today's portion for me? If it isn't, would I release it into God's care and go on about today's duties?
Thank you, little birds. Your were God's visual today in the "Learning More About Trust" crash course He has assigned me.
ever grateful for that

Would you consider taking what is mine?

2010-04-09T05:19:00.001-07:00

I am dedicating this post to you, my mysterious Japanese, Chinese, or some other "eese" reader that sends me comments that lead to your porn site. At first, I was so thrilled that someone outside my little world was reading about my views on life and sharing the same grateful responses to God's care--thrilled until I clicked on your comment.
That is when I discovered your trick, a subtle plan to somehow lure me into your world view.
It amazes me and encourages me that you continue to read about my joy, my pain, my faith, my woodpile and my little fountain. Perky breasts seem to be your cup of tea,(I admit I wish mine were more so) and yet you read about the thrill a first hyacinth brings me and how I am trusting God with everything and everyone I hold dear. Trust is an alluring topic, don't you agree?

Oh dear searching one. First, let me assure you that I have discovered by God's good grace, that indeed, without surrendering to His compelling love in my life, I, like you, am capable of anything that would eventually break my heart and the hearts of my family, foster lust and pride in my mind, and lead me to loneliness and despair. But, hear this! There is a choice that is offered us. It is as much for me as for you. It is for every empty, broken, rich, poor, healthy, sick, and living soul on the planet.
It is Jesus. The same Jesus that sees your life and mine, sees we can never be with Him in paradise because of our sin, sees that without His rescue we will perish, forever.
Oh reader, would you consider taking what is mine? It is a commodity that never runs out, there is always enough to share.You would be taking hope, taking peace of mind and heart, taking joy and clean fun, even taking pain (which you will have, by the way) and being able to walk in it with the comfort of Jesus by your side.
The world you are living in seems to have the answer to your constant pursuit of happiness and satisfaction. It is a lie....there is no true satisfaction outside of knowing God. All else is temporary, needing to be constantly refilled for one more moment of counterfeit happiness.
I am praying for you dear reader; praying for you, not because I am looking down on you and seeing myself as better. I am praying for you because Jesus has shown me we are all alike. I just have met Him first. He has paid for what I have done, and in my heart that is full of self-interest, will do again. I want you to have what I have... a confidence in a Savior that has saved me from myself, a love that never fails, a peace the world cannot give, and a life that never ends.
"For God so greatly loved and dearly prized the world that He even gave up His only Son, so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish-come to destruction, be lost-but have eternal and ever lasting life.
For God did not send the Son into the world in order to judge-to reject, to condemn, to pass sentence on-the world;but that the world (you and me) might find salvation and be made safe and sound through Him. John 3:16,17 (amplified version)
For that I am forever grateful! May we be safe together....

Small Joys

2010-04-03T04:06:00.000-07:00

My husband's favorite quote is "never give up" by Winston Churchill. It is a mighty good thing because he never quit digging 'til the gigantic hole was dug for our fountain. You'll have to read the previous blog to get the full significance of this task.
I am so happy to have the sound and sight of it whenever I go out, or look out the window. I find it has the exact same effect on me as a fire in the winter...it cheers, it comforts and it affords great company. I have had the thrill of watching the birds find it to drink and to bathe.
When life has deep disappointments, or when life is satisfying you with great good fortune, never underestimate the joy there is to be found in the capacity to enjoy small pleasures.

God has lavishly strewn our lives with myriads of small delights that reflect His love for us. Sometimes it takes a will to look for them. I see now more than ever in my life, it is Him in every joy, it is Him in every sadness, it is Him in all things that help us discover true joy. This week, amidst sad days, He provided the joy of this little fountain. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "when it is dark enough, you can see all the stars." Look for stars when your nights are dark. I am finding many small joys when I am looking for the Giver, not the gift.
ever grateful for that!

where there is a will, there IS a way

2010-03-29T14:01:00.000-07:00

I am in the season of learning "not my will but yours, Lord." However in the matter of installing and enjoying a fountain in my garden, I am in the throws of finding a way to make this happen for it is a perfect illustration of "where there is a will, there is a way."
I truly think it delights God for me to have a little fountain, so 2 rounds of Advil later, I am only one half of the way down the hole I must dig to place the liner under it. One of my dear friends, a garden and fountain diva, assures me this seemingly family size thing looking more like a hot tub with every few inches I dig, is exactly the right size for the bang I want for my buck. It hasn't helped much to find a family of gnarly roots and an old fence post still stuck in the concrete footing in the middle of my hole!
Moving the fountain location will mess up the design I have envisioned for a year, so I'm counting on that great big ol' man of mine to dynamite the post out if necessary. I'm not going that far, just because he probably won't let me, but it is going to come out! I've got the will, I'll find a way.

Spring is here. Is it there where you are? I cannot imagine a spring moment much richer than feasting my eyes on the new fresh green that wraps itself around the yellows, purples and pinks in my garden, while listening to the splash and gurgle of water running over the sides of my new fountain urn. I fully expect the birds to bathe and drink there while tending to their important bird business (making homes and children, you know). I am very close to the completion of that dream--I'll just lie down for a while with icy hot on my back, then dig a while more then look up the number of "jaws of life" if the big guns need to be called in. I read somewhere that Archimedes said "with a long enough lever and a solid enough place to stand you could move the world." I hope he learned that from moving a fence post in concrete.
My next little blog will feature a photo of my new fountain, Lord willing.
ever grateful for that

"A picture is worth a thousand words", but not in this case!

2010-03-26T14:18:00.000-07:00

Dear blog fans, (fans might be an exaggerated term)
I love to write, I love to put into words things that swirl around in my head and heart, but I have been frustrated with the fact that when I write about things that have no picture to enhance the text, the blog lines up with some totally unrelated picture...for example, lets say I have spilled my guts over some tragic experience that totally changed my world view and beside it is a picture of our 5 year old grand daughter standing on her head smiling upside down in the swimming pool! Or even more confusing, a blog about the unexpected joy of discovering purple hyacinths emerging in my garden, aligned directly across from a snapshot of the biggest fish I ever caught!

I don't like things out of order, but like many other things in my life, I don't seem to have any control. Someone who is familiar with how settings, layouts, and all the other options work could enlighten me, of course, but for now, you will have to ignore the picture to left of the blog, knowing it has no bearing on the subject. Or, you could just make up an amazing reason how it might somehow illustrate the point--that might work when I'm writing and not making much sense to anyone but myself.

So, Lord willing, I'll be writing more and more. I find life's circumstances a daily teacher of enormous truths just emerging, like my hyacinths, to ponder and to make my own. Why do you have to be 63 to begin to understand what God has been saying to you for 40 years?

I'll close with this enormous question that holds great truth:
"Do you judge God in light of your circumstances? Or do you judge your circumstances in the light of God's character?"

ever grateful for the question, and ever grateful to God who is revealing His true character to me

new friends and family

2010-03-19T16:48:00.000-07:00

I have been away from home a month. Actually, I didn't realize I could write on my little blog from anywhere but home, that shows you how technically savy I am. As I write I am tucked into my (actually Joseph's) little bed that has been a comfy haven for me at night. Because I have made several long-term visits here, I have made new and wonderful friends whom I treasure because of their servant's hearts and their tender care of Clare, Barry, Sam and Joseph.

I have seen wonderful meals brought to the back door, rides galore for the children to fun places and play dates, cards, letters, gifts, visits, prayers and every imaginable kindness.
God's people are unique in all the world. The New England branch of His family have astonished me with never-failing love and service. I thought the Southern bunch had a corner on the casserole bringin' and the lending of a hand when you needed it, but I've got to say, this bunch of folks puts us Southerners to shame.
There is really no good time to leave this precious family, but I am so grateful to God that He has placed this little family in the center of a circle of true and trustworthy brothers and sisters who will be here when I cannot be and do for them things that I could never do. I go home seeing Isaiah 41:10 lived out for my daughter, my son-in-law, and my darling grandsons.

"Fear not, for I am with you. I will strengthen you, I will hold you with my righteous right hand, I will help you."

There really isn't any way to thank these precious souls, we just will have to pass it on.
ever grateful for that, e.

Love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13:8

2010-02-10T08:37:00.000-08:00

As I was making Valentine cards for those I am privileged to love, my heart filled to overflowing with the blessing of having ones to love. It really comes down to seeing the giving of love as thrilling as the getting of it. As I put aside thoughts that try to trouble me, 'what-if's' that want to distract me, let us look at what some others have said about this amazing grace, a thing called love.

"This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you." -Jesus
"Without love, the poor and rich man live in the same house."-unknown
"Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit." Ustinov
"Love is the condition in which the happiness of the other person is essential to your own. -Moore
"Loving people live in a loving world. Hostile people live in a hostile world. Same world."-Dyer
"Love makes your soul crawl out of its hiding place."-unknown
Love doesn't make the world go around. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile."

"A bell is no bell 'til you ring it,
A song is no song 'til you sing it.
Love in your heart wasn't put there to stay,

Love isn't love 'til you give it away." -Oscar Hammerstein

"Love is not love which alters when if alteration finds." -Shakespeare
"There is no greater spectacle than a beautiful woman cooking dinner for someone
she loves."
"I never knew how to worship until I learned how to love." Henry Ward Beecham
"Love is the greatest touch up artist of all." -Braun (ever grateful for that!)
"I love you not only for what you are, but what I am when I am with you." -Browning
"To illustrate the power of love is to set a candle in the sun."
"Hell is to no longer love."
"Love, like death, levels all ranks and lays the shepherd's crook beside the king's scepter."

My advice for the day? Fall in love with love, it never fails!
ever grateful for that!

When your hands are tied

2010-02-07T12:50:00.000-08:00

"How reasonable to trust ourselves, our children, to infinite love, infinite wisdom and infinite power."
Have your hands ever been tied by total inability to change something that your heart screams to change? As I seek the Lord for comfort and assurance that HIS hands are never unable to move in behalf of those I love, I am prompted to remember....remember how He has never failed us. Like David, I cry "why are you cast down, oh my soul?" I know the answer. I am cast down today because my child walks around with a broken heart and I have a "fix-it" idol that has met its match. I cannot fix it. I cannot make her circumstances go away. I cannot even tell her they will go away.
We find ourselves in that place we have never wanted to find ourselves in. The place is called "helplessness." It is amazing how seldom I have visited this dreaded place. In my self-centered world where I can tweek most everything a bit to make it more comfortable for me, God, in His love and wisdom, has brought me to a place of complete and utter dependence upon Him.
I have no answers. I have no advice. I have no power. He reminded me today thru a dear friend to never look upon anything without looking at it through the filter of the cross. The cross is the final and ultimate proof of God's love. So, I remember His love. I remember His unfailing love and wait upon Him. He will do for me and my beloved family what we cannot do for ourselves.

Enter like a little child

2010-02-02T11:08:00.000-08:00

Oh, precious carefree childhood! When Jesus said you enter the Kingdom of Heaven like a little child, I am just beginning to understand what He means. Children believe, children trust, children accept, children play, children don't hold grudges, children don't worry about tomorrow.

While on a retreat last weekend, a mother told the story about her little boy in his car seat asking when he was going to Heaven. "Not anytime soon," the mother explained. "Jesus is in Heaven making a wonderful home just for you, and when it is ready He will come and get you."
Her son replied, "Do you know what I'm gonna do until Jesus comes and gets me? I'm just gonna play."

Wow! Could we believe like that, entrusting all our cares to Him, and just be? Do we dare try to enjoy this journey down here, leaving all the big stuff to Him ? Could we, like little children, do whatever He asks without having to know all the why's of it all, go wherever He leads without always having to know ahead of time every step of the journey, how long it will take, and what the final destination is? Could we, with child-like faith, put our heads on our pillows tonight not fretting over what tomorrow will hold, how we might hurt, how much faith we will need, how we might fail? The answer is yes, we can. It takes deeply knowing who our Father is and how dearly He loves us.
That is the gospel, trusting God to do for us what we cannot do for ourselves and believing HE WILL!
Jesus said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children." Matthew 11:25
ever grateful for that!

The Saturday you've always wanted

2010-01-30T07:33:00.000-08:00

Here at last! A snowy Saturday, everything, I mean everything cancelled because of the snow (with the just right amount of ice on top). No wedding shower to attend, no appointment to keep, no ballgame to cheer, no groceries to get, no NOTHING but the building of a fire, studying the Word, listening to music, eating taco soup and cornbread, watching the birds and writing in my little blog!
By the way, 2 comments on yesterday's blog broke my comment record -you know who you are so give yourselves a little squeeze from me.

Let's close with some lovely and true quotes about snow:

"Kindness is like snow-it beautifies everything it covers." -unknown
"Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery."
"Advice is like snow-the softer it falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. Samuel Taylor Coleridge

"The Battle is Mine, saith the Lord"

2010-01-27T14:51:00.000-08:00

Beware blogger friends. I was so excited to announce that I had a comment from someone in China, written in the lovely Chinese letters which, of course, I cannot read. Hoping to gain understanding and maybe see"love your blog", I showed it to Phil, and I clicked on the message--no, not "love your blog!" Up popped a PORNO KITTEN from China!!! So much for my ego!

Life so far this year has been a case study in "not what one plans" for the new year, or any old year for that matter. However, because of the serious illness of a beloved family member, I have had the privilege of going to the battlefield, serving the troops, and hunkering down in little foxholes with Jesus, our Commander and Chief. He is teaching all of us how to trust him, actually, that He IS our trust.
One of the most valuable lessons thus far is finally sinking in with this training--you do NOT run, there is no peace, no comfort, and no provision for a soldier on the run from the battle God has you in. On the contrary, protection and peace come from meeting your enemy head on, with the knowledge that, unlike normal warfare,we are strengthened by the surrender of our wills to the will of our Lord, and triumphant in the knowledge that God, our Sword and Shield, goes before us in every skirmish.
One thing for certain, in this battle with fear and "what-if", there is an amazing power available to battle weary soldiers. That power comes from trusting in the NAME, the name above all names, the name that has the power to become its name for you in time of need. A name that beckons us to look not at the circumstances of the battle, but look the character of our Leader. Let us learn to trust that name, Jesus, our Advocate, Jesus, our Hiding Place, Jesus, Our Chief Shepherd, Jesus, our deliverer, Jesus, our Shelter, Jesus, the Lover of our Souls.
We will have battles to fight all the rest of our lives. Let us never lose sight of the precious and life altering fact that God Himself, our Redeemer, has already won the War! In every grip of fear the enemy tries to hold you in, look up--God's banner over you is love.
-ever grateful for that!

hip hip hooray!

2009-11-08T13:06:00.000-08:00

It may be a tad early for us to be talking about snow, but come cool weather, rain, sleet,or freezing nights, we are officially READY! When we looked for a new home one thing that was on the top of the have-to-have (Lord willing) list: a wood burning fireplace. Well, talk about "grateful", this girl was and is more than grateful to have found such a lovely one that works so well and provides the same exact coziness as our old one, the same exact comfort, and the same exact thrill. Now, if that were not enough, today we put together our wood rack and stacked our new load of wood on it. Honestly, as I think I said in a past entry, I almost have to call 911 when I see wood stacked, ready and waiting.

Is it the "ant syndrome," you know, being ready for winter? Or is it more the romance of cutting, stacking and working together that makes the enjoyment of a wood fire so lovely? Is it the warmth, the unmatchable smell, or the welcome it evokes that makes it so wonderful? I don't really know why a fire brings such joy, but I am ever grateful for it and a soul mate to share it with who seems to love it as much as I.

"the darker the storm, the brighter the fire," Jane Austen

the morning sun

2009-11-06T05:06:00.000-08:00

This little entry is for you, Brenda, my most faithful and maybe only follower.
One wonderful truth God has taught me is to look for anything and everything that I am grateful for and take the time to ponder the nourishing effect it has upon my everyday life. There is a daily occurrence that has remained near the top of my list for years, the morning sun. It fills my house with early golden light, moving across the floor (revealing previously invisible dust) and highlighting objects that I love, giving them an ethereal glow for a moment. Many mornings you may find me slowly moving around the rooms waiting and watching for this momentary magic trick only the sun can pull off. I have taken so many pictures, but none ever do justice to the thrill if affords.

One reward I receive for early rising is to be met by long, bright rays of sunshine flooding the hall as I leave my bedroom. God's everlasting faithfulness is once again revealed by the constant return of the sun, a life-giving miracle that we often take for granted. I suppose that without realizing it, the sun has always carried more than warmth and light for me. It is a reminder of "new mercies" that always accompany a new day in Christ Jesus. New hope, new opportunities, a new way to see something......

"No matter how dark the night, somehow the morning sun rises over again and all shadows are chased away." David Click
ever grateful for that!

A Perfect Birthday

2009-09-30T14:51:00.000-07:00

God never fails to order up delightful weather for my birthday! I've had years where sweat would be dripping off my hair on September 29th, but lo and behold on September 30th I have to grab a sweater for the cool wind and sunglasses for the bright sun. It has been a day of friends, love and much joy. I don't even have to cook supper!

I've been working in our little garden. Who could have known, (least of all me) how beautiful our new little home would be to me. I cannot name my favorite room. Dorothy knew her stuff when she said, "There's no place like home." Before our move, I guess I thought our home had to be the one we had. Oh, sweet blog friend, your home is where your loved ones are, where your well-loved things are, and where Jesus is. So, like Dorothy, I click together my muddy brown Crocs and agree "there is truly no place like home."

It's Fall and last year this time I was writing about my passion for it. I won't bore you with repeating my sappy love for every minute of it, but let me close with this stirring word picture found in "Autumn" (a precious gift from Clare a couple of birthdays ago.)
"October gave a party, the leaves by hundreds came-the chestnuts, oaks and maples-their costumes all aflame. Miss Weather led the dancing, Professor wind the band. The guests were all a flutter and danced off hand in hand." george cooper
ever grateful for that picture.....

"

Contentment

2009-07-26T14:10:00.000-07:00

Well, man does make his plans, but God does direct his path. I have never known the truth of that statement as well as I do now. The good news is, God's paths are way neater, way more satisfying and way more wonderful even if you don't think they will be.
Phil and I have sold our home I thought I could never leave and paid for a lovely home (I refuse to call it a condo) that I now don't think I could ever leave.

As I type I am watching a tiny hummingbird feed just outside my window. Everything about our new "nest" is a blessing to us. Every morning Phil says, "I am so happy." I am just as happy as he and ever grateful for God's big vision in spite of our sometimes tiny one and His marvelous provision for not only our needs but our desires.

I guess if I want this little blog to speak to anyone's heart today, I would have it say, "gain contentment." Contentment is without a doubt the most precious state of mind and spirit and worth more than just about anything else one could desire. The most amazing thing about it is that anyone can have it! It is simply the result of not getting what we want, but recognizing and appreciating what we have. Oh, how monumental it is to embrace your life, just as it is. From that vantage point, God can outdo Himself (as if that were possible!) If we can just learn to trust Him, He will pull many bunnies from His hat, surprising and delighting us with His divine ability to know us better than we know ourselves!

We call our home our "nest." Let me rephrase that. I call it a "nest" but think that Phil thinks that name is a little cheesy. But we will NEVER call it a "condo." Nest is a word that conjures up a much more accurate description of our new home. One of kind? yes- Cozy? immensely so -Made to fit us? exactly-Safe? very... I could go on but you get the picture.

Let me close by saying this, don't go looking for happiness and contentment as if it is a button that has rolled under the sofa. You will find it when you accept your life, and go about your day doing the things God has put before you with a grateful heart.

"Contentment is a pearl of great price, and whoever procures it at the expense of a 1000 desires makes a wise and happy purchase."

Can you say, "Man makes his plans, but God directs his steps?"

2009-03-31T09:06:00.000-07:00

"He is happiest, be he king or peasant, who finds peace in his home." Whoa! What a difference 3 months can make! To all those very few but faithful blog followers, I am back. So much has happened since the lovely pictures of the old log cabin and the hope of building on it's land. Cyberspace cannot hold the long version explaining why now we want to buy a condo! If anyone had told me that this would be in our future, I would have said, "Well, one thing is clear, you do not know me." This would be the equivalent of me buying a plastic Christmas tree, or choosing gas logs over the real thing, or buying margarine instead of sweet cream butter!
Turns out, God is pretty much the only one, including myself, who really knows me.
The closer we got, the less peace we had about this decision of building in the country...let's face it, we are old! We would be facing the hardest work of our lives, blah, blah, blah, so let me just say that God brought us to our senses just in time.

Now my chickens will have to walk around in my paintings, and my big garden will be a little one surrounding our fenced-in patio. Another plus is Phil won't be spending the entire weekend cutting grass, weed-eating and hoeing. All the outside work is done for us. I've never had a work-free weekend, there is no telling what we might be free to get into! We have peace and know that anywhere we live we will have each other (Lord willing) and we will have Him and we will be content--ever grateful for that!

2009-01-19T02:29:00.000-08:00

Once a year thrills

2008-12-04T14:17:00.000-08:00

What can compare to opening a little box you only see once a year and discovering anew that little forest of tiny Christmas trees you wrapped up early last January? They are the backbone of a tiny snowy village I make with silver tinsel, glittered-up paper houses and fluffy cotton snow. What a rush!!!
To top that feeling, I unearth the awe-inspiring plastic nativity scene unknowingly bought at a July yard sale 5 years ago. It was stuffed at the bottom of a paper sack filled with paper goods I got for a dollar. Unlike any other plastic Nativity scene I've ever seen, it has the vintage glow of ivory and a graceful camel that I kiss on the nose every year when I pull him out.
My favorite Christmas decorations are the old ones, full of memories from Christmases past. A classic example of an inexpensive yet priceless memory maker is a cardboard stable with figures collected over many years by Phil's mother. When their home was sold, I dove for it to take to our home, bringing with it the feeling of peace and joy I had looking at it in their darkened living room, lighted by a little Christmas bulb in the top of the manger. Every figure seems to come from a different set and the lambs (mostly 3 legged) actually seems to know what is happening because I think I see a little smile on their faces.
Years ago I made 2 paper garlands of "nine ladies dancing" and "ten lords a-leaping." When I hang that on our mantle in the living room my blood pressure rises. Honestly, it rivals a mink coat for thrills. When the late afternoon sun hits the merry dancers, and their shadows dance behind them, call 911, or put my head between my knees 'cause it is the stuff faints are made of.

Christmas is a sacred time. It truly holds the reason to rejoice no matter what your circumstances are, the reason to sing "Joy to the World, the Lord has Come" and mean it. I'll close this little blog with a couple of stanzas from a poem by my favorite, Longfellow. He wrote this poem during the Civil war and it was put to music for one of our most stirring Christmas carols. Take note of how timely his words are for us today-- truth is truth no matter when you hear it--ever grateful for that!

...And in despair I bowed my head;
"There is no peace on earth," I said;
"For hate is strong,
And mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!"

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep;
"God is not dead, nor doth He sleep!
The wrong shall fail,
The Right prevail,
With peace on earth, good-will to men!"

Spreading the Thanksgiving spirit

2008-11-26T05:20:00.000-08:00

This week I had a couple of little "future moms" to my house to make Thanksgiving aprons and bake their very own Thanksgiving offerings for their families. Let me say that it was wonderful watching them bubble over with excitement with all the stirring, egg cracking, cookie cutting and tasting we did. In spite of the fact that MiMi fell off her chair holding her pan of pumpkin bread batter, and I missed the oven rack and poured one of their pans of cranberry orange bread batter INTO a 375 degree oven, we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.

We made "worried turkey" thumbprint paintings and designed a tiny apron using rick rack (don't you just LOVE rick rack?) with stamped polka dots and a handprint turkey. They were two very proud and stylish chefs!

Thanksgiving is truly the best day of the year. What other day is created to evoke a grateful heart? It is a time that we need to foster,emphasize and discuss with our children. With Christmas ever lurking to overpower and eliminate Thanksgiving, I believe strongly in intentionally slowing down and savoring every opportunity we have to ponder our blessings and talk about them openly with those God has placed in our lives. Christmas is beautiful, Christmas is a blessed day, but lets unite in the fight to revere Thanksgiving in our hearts and homes and not be overshadowed by the "hurry up and let's get to Christmas" spirit that pervades our culture.

Besides being a symbol of all that is good in our country and in our intentions, what other day lets you eat all you want, actually expects a soul to have a little of each pie and all the dressing and gravy an old Pilgrim like me can hold? -ever grateful for that!

Savor every fleeting moment

2008-11-07T08:15:00.000-08:00

" Even if something is left undone, everyone must take time to sit and watch the leaves turn."

"Autumn is the second spring when every leaf is a flower."

"Thy bounty shines in autumn unconfined and spreads a feast over all that live."

"I love the fall. I love it because of the smells and things are dying, things you don't have to take care of anymore, and the grass stops growing."

"The heart of autumn must have broken here, and poured its treasure out upon the leaves."

"A power of china"

2008-11-04T11:27:00.000-08:00

In one of Sarah Orne Jewett's novels, Deephaven, two girls discover a dining room cupboard filled with "a power of china." I loved that description. They were referring to the amount of it, but I find china does wield a certain power over me and some other dish divas as well. Come on , admit who you are! In my dining room pie safe and crammed into my pantry, are way too many sets of dishes that refuse to be given away, sold, or even stored out of sight. Is it the memories they evoke? Is it the fear that even though I may not have used some of them in this century, if I got rid of them I would immediately have a desperate need to serve some seldom thought- of dish that only that light blue fluted "thingamajig" would hold? Is it a hording complex? Whatever it is, my children will have to deal with it all after I am gone.

My Mary Hadley pottery--my mother had this farm pattern when I was a child, and I love its color and its simple elegance-not to mention the rush I get from the chicken plates!

My English breakfast set-- the only truly fine china I own, it is to die for (I thought I would be old enough to die before I saved enough money to buy it.)

Phil's mother's "Avon Rose"--I can't use it without picturing it on MiMi's dining room table laden with turkey, dressing, sweet potatoes and cranberry sauce. I also have her set of vintage Santa plates and matching glasses that bring cravings for cold coconut cake and homemade boiled custard!

My mother's German china--lime green and pink cabbage roses trimmed in gold. She, like me, had to save up to buy it and it is precious to me for it brings back memories of her table and the love she put into her simple, delicious food.

My yard sale English china--I bought it in Scotland at a yard sale across from a castle! It belonged to the lady's mother (deceased) and it is beyond beautiful with exotic birds and a pale blue border. She gave me a jar of homemade Ruebarb jam that day--what a day!

My junk store treasure--amazingly beautiful aqua and brown china that I use most often. I found it in New England and paid $25.00 for it, but it makes me feel like a million every time I set the table with it.

My "Audun Ferme"--a lovely black and white china with different pastoral scenes on it. It warms my heart with its simple scenes of the things I love and fantasize about like having chickens, shephards and cows enjoying themselves on my "small holding" in France.

My 2 sets of white Walmart dishes-- really cheap, really great-goes with everything and though a little warped, have stood the test of time and grandchildren.

My "snowman" not china--I don't know what this stuff is made of, but it is made IN china, and I use it all summer long for soup for Phil and I. I don't know why I use it for soup cause when you microwave it the bowl turns into a smoking furnace, while its contents remain cold as ice. It's pretty ugly now. The snow is turning a light brown (ugh) and there are chips here and there but it is (or was) really cute. This one I may ditch. I wouldn't want my daughters-in-law to comment on how odd I was to keep such pitiful looking stuff. As a matter of fact, I don't even like it anymore after I have seen it for what it really is-old, and getting really ugly.

Women and their dishes-like men and their _______, just can't be separated. Perhaps the tie that binds are the special memories--the holidays, the birthday dinners, celebrating good friends and good food, and all the love that is bound up in using things you love for the people you love. That I am ever grateful for.

"Its not what's on the plate that matters, its what's on the chairs."

"Just because you have four chairs, six matching plates, and three cups is not a reason you can't invite twelve to dinner."

Woodpiles and Fireplaces

2008-10-28T07:57:00.000-07:00

Ah, woodpiles and fireplaces!!! There lie the two passions that propel me into actually enjoying bad weather. Someone said, "the darker the weather outside, the brighter the fire." I am a certified "pyromaniac" and plan to revel in that mania for as long as I can haul the wood into the house and onto the hearth. There is no such thing as loneliness beside a winter fire. There is never a want of companionship beside it's warmth. Nothing can fill me with an awareness of my blessings or invite contentment like sitting by our blazing hearth. Looking out from my fireside seems to hold at arm's length any nagging discontent that might rob me of recognizing the everyday, ordinary blessings I see from this" best seat in the house."

Fires and their amazing emotional benefits aren't limited to fireplaces inside your home. A little fire in your yard on a cool afternoon does wonders for your soul. Last week I spent several magic afternoons in Clare's New England backyard around a campfire that served as a magnet to neighborhood children (experimenting with a stick and crescent roll dough), and later a lovely little tea party with an elderly widow invited from next door. They were packed with more entertainment, goodwill and happiness than any elegant catered affair. Oh, and who can forget what it does to a hot dog or a marshmallow!

I can't write another word about fires without praising its source- the humble woodpile. The sight of one, lovingly stacked, elevates my blood pressure a bit. When I spot one beside a house,the desire to stare, to covet, to picture its influence over their home makes me a danger to other drivers. Phil didn't realize when we said our vows that I wanted to add to the "better or worse" part a vow to include a promise to keep the woodpile full, no matter the hardship, no matter the expense. Fortunately, he loves fires too and only needs to see my ever increasing depression set in when the woodpile is decreasing to do whatever it takes to replenish the honored commodity. I'm ever grateful for that!

"Happiness grows at our own firesides, and it is not to be picked in stranger's gardens."

"The family fireside is the best of schools."

"You are a king, by your own fireside, as much as any monarch on his throne."

Fall turns me into a "sap"

2008-10-13T04:55:00.000-07:00

OK, here it is, not the hint of it, not the anticipation of it, but IT! This season truly turns me into a sentimental sap, letting down my guard over my emotions. Fall always tenderizes my heart after summer's heat has somehow hardened it, like it does to the late summer earth. Poignant memories and bittersweet endings swirl around me in the cool air like leaves making their way to the ground. I am an autumn nut case. This season means so many things to me. I fell in love with Phil in the fall, gave my heart and life to Jesus in the fall, have my birthday in the fall, write poetry in the fall, cry at the drop of a hat in the fall, and spend time lying on the ground and staring into space a lot remembering and dreaming.

Listen to some great things other fall nuts have written:

October gave a party, the leaves by the hundreds came-
the chestnuts, oaks and maples-their costumes all aflame.
Miss Weather led the dancing, Professor wind the band.
The guests were all aflutter and danced off hand in hand." -Cooper

"Delicious Autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns. George Eliot

"If a man watches more than 3 football games in a row he should be declared legally dead." Erma Bombeck

My secret weapon

2008-10-07T07:50:00.000-07:00

I got two new aprons for my birthday, both beauties! Before I begin this little tribute to one of life's secret weapons, let me make it clear that aprons and the wearing of them, have the power to transform me, much like Superwoman's lasso. I realize there are tons of women who do not like aprons-or maybe don't like what they think they stand for. I certainly don't pass judgment on this, each woman must march to her own drumbeat. However, I wouldn't live without them due to their incredible usefulness, and what they represent to me.

When I paint, I wear my apron (the one that has hints of dozens of paintings all over it.) When I cook I wear the one with stains from past pot roasts, cherry pies, or maybe that is marinara sauce, anyway it covers my clothes, serves as a cup towel for spills and a kleenex for fogged up glasses when I open the oven door. Whenever I get serious about shining things up around here, I wear my apron, not because I get that dirty, but because it changes my attitude toward housework, and any other task I tackle here on the home front. I have a garden apron, stained with dirt and pockets big enough for seed packets, garden string and various other necessities. My apron is my uniform of choice. When I tie it around me I feel more ready, more equipped, more willing. Much like a fireman facing a fire without his suit, I feel a bit unequal to the task without my apron.

I read a marvelous article about aprons by Nancy Campbell. She talked about her grandmother and her apron. It carried fresh laundry from the line, wiped children's tears, dusted furniture, carried vegetables from the garden, and countless other important tasks. I cried when I realized how far we have come from what embracing our role at home meant then and what it means now. Of course, appliances have made our work at home much easier, I'm all over that. What makes me sad is what has happened to our hearts over the past 30 years. It seems many dread, or resent what has made homemaking an art for centuries. It is the resentment that tells the tale and stops the blessing of this art from being handed down mother to daughter.

Homemaking is not easy, but thankfully, it is not about a perfect home, rather having a heart that is grateful for the opportunity to create something powerful. Nancy Campbell beautifully said that we should put on our "attitude apron" as well. I believe that serving our families in love, no matter what the world tries to preach, is the most noble, most valuable arena we will ever be in. Little girls may grow up to be doctors, scientists, writers, astronauts or pilots, but if they choose to also be wives and mothers, I hope their hearts are as committed to creating a home as a career.

I gave our only grandaughter an apron for Christmas last year. She was only three but who knows, maybe seeing her grandmother wear one each time she comes over will plant some kind of little seed that will grow into more than a memory, maybe an example. Maybe one day she will roll up her sleeves, tie on her apron and feel equipped to tackle some heroic stuff in her home. After all, wives and mothers are the stuff heroes are made of. One of the biggest impacts you can have on people, in or out of the home, is consistently taking on the task at hand, however small, with love. I'm ever grateful for that.

Beauty in the eye of the beholder

2008-10-03T08:28:00.000-07:00

Thoreau said, "Nature does not cast pearls before swine. There is just as much beauty visible in the landscape as we are prepared to appreciate,-not a grain more."
I love this quote (even though in that first part he tweeked the Bible a bit) because I find it is absolutely true. The more you love it, study it, marvel over it, the more you see and the more wonder it produces in your life. I guess you could call me wonder-struck, for I can't get enough!

Clare (my nature-loving daughter) shared with me yesterday that in England someone is campaigning to bring back "nature tables" to the schools. Remember ( if you are old enough to have this memory) the big, low table in your elementary school room filled with wasps nests, rocks,butterflies, scary looking dried walking sticks and praying mantis? Remember how your teacher would take you there every day and talk about each item, inviting you to ask questions and bring whatever you found to share with the class? What she was doing was trying to cultivate your imagination and a perception and regard for what is true, through observation.

We teach children facts all the time, but do we teach them the value of observation? To see a thing is not just looking at it. Nature study also cultivates a love of the beautiful and a comradeship with life out doors while educating us about our amazing world. Our world needs children who have an appreciation and understanding of nature as much as children who understand technology. If we, as parents and grandparents don't foster and hand down this important knowledge to our children and grandchildren, our world will be filled with self-centered young adults with thin souls. Nature is a great teacher of our small place in the vast universe. However to me, the most important aspect of nature study is its undeniable power to proclaim its creator. "Nature is full of genius, full of the divinity; so that not a snowflake escapes its fashioning hand." The more you appreciate nature's offerings, the bigger role gratitude plays in your heart, and that, my friend, is a mighty good thing!

We have a nature table in our library here at home. It is filled with found objects that bring God and His love for us inside our house. Acorns, butterflies, pressed leaves, intricate shells, moss, bird feathers, eggs, nests and other wondrous designs He's come up with for our pleasure, are all over it. Here, too, are nature guide books about birds, insects, trees and plants. I'm always on the look out for fresh finds because our grandchildren have free reign to pick up, carry around, rub and poke the treasures. A bird nest can stand just so much investigation, especially by a certain 3 year old we've nicknamed "jackhammer." But as Longfellow said, "there are no birds in last year's nest" so we'll just go and have the joy of finding another one--ever grateful for that.

If I don't do it now

2008-09-20T06:28:00.000-07:00

As one approaches 62, all manner of thoughts begin to swirl around in one's greying head. There are the normal "getting older" thoughts like, "who IS that in the mirror?", or the uncomfortable feeling you get at the grocery when the 10 year old checkout boy looks at you as if you weren't there. It's hard to explain how crummy it feels to be invisible, you will just have to get older to understand that one.

There are, too, the wonderful, "I am so glad I did that" thoughts, the "I'll pass on that, thank you" thoughts, the "slowing down is kinda fun" thoughts, the "let's stay home tonight" thoughts, and lots of others that make getting older just fine. Then, there are the "if I don't do this now, I'll never have the chance" thoughts. Those can be extremely motivating. The idea that I will never have a pony tail again if I don't start one now has inspired me to persevere through all the shaggy hair days ahead in the hope I'll soon enjoy that ever-stylish, maintenance- free pony tail I wore in my forties. With the help of headbands, barrettes, bobby pins and clips I resolve to see this dream become a reality. If, when I reach my goal, I discover it's not all that it was cracked up to be, I'll whack it off, but I will never have to say, "if only."

I have much bigger dreams for my future, of course. Maybe the dream of growing old with a ponytail will serve to remind me along the way that "the longest journey begins with the first step." There are much greater decisions to make as a person reaches the last third of life- decisions that can affect the quality of his life and everyone in it, for that matter.
I want to reach the end still resolving, still trying, still hoping and still smiling.

"Even the woodpecker owes his success to the fact that he uses his head and keeps pecking away until he finishes the job he starts." Coleman Cox

He is going to hate this!

2008-09-05T10:51:00.000-07:00

Every so often there comes a time when you just have to do what you have to do. I have to write about my number one passion even though he (the subject of this passion) will not like it for he NEVER wants attention drawn to himself. (He doesn't even want me to have a funeral service for him if that gives you a better picture.) The beautiful part is that I know he will forgive me for this little blog-for he has forgiven me for far more. I love that about him.

This #1 is Phil, my husband of 40, yes, 40 years. When I first met him, August 14, 1968, I knew, I just knew that he would be the reason I would no longer want to live for myself. And, as it turned out, he felt the same- I love that about him. I won't bore you with everything I love about the man, for I have to honor his feelings. So, in light of that, I will be more brief than I really want to.

We call him "a rock." He has never failed to be 100% there for me and our children when we have needed him, I love that about him. I can be cheesy, emotional, dorky, unattractive, pouty or dramatic and he still likes me. In his eyes, I never have "a bad hair day." I do love that about him. He loves the Lord, loves his children and grandchildren, loves to be at "the camp" more than anywhere on earth, always cheers for the underdog, always tells the truth, and his love is a tender power that makes me better than I am. You have to love that about him. These quotes are just for him--that big guy I'm ever grateful for.

"In thy face I see the map of honor, truth and loyalty." Shakespeare

"To put yourself in second place is the whole significance of life." Roberts

"Familiar acts are beautiful through love." Shelley

"Can't help lovin' that man 'o mine." Rogers & Hammerstein

"God's glory is on tour in the skies..."

2008-09-03T14:55:00.000-07:00

My favorite version of Psalm 19 is in The Message. It says, "God's glory is on tour in the skies, God- craft on exhibit across the horizon. Madame Day holds classes every morning, Professor Night lectures each evening...." George Washington Carver said, "I love to think of Nature as an unlimited broadcasting station, through which God speaks to us every hour if we will only tune in." He has designed the world we live in to proclaim Himself in all He has made. This proclamation serves to remind me and comfort me that He is everywhere, and has even me and mine smack in the middle of His radar screen. His majesty, His power, His beauty, His faithfulness and His love are paraded in the skies, the water and the earth, even in a lowly pack of Zinnia seeds, or the wren's nest hidden in our window box.

When I find myself in need of a little encouragement from God that He is firmly and sovereignly holding this world together when it seems like it is falling apart, a great part of the encouragement I receive is from"considering the worlds His hands have made." I am ever grateful for that.

"Earth's crammed with Heaven, and every bush afire with God." Elizabeth Barrett Browning

"Nature is the living, visible garment of God." Van Goethe

"Beauty is God's handwriting." Charles Kingsley

When a child is born, so are grandmothers

2008-09-02T10:43:00.000-07:00

MiMi, Tom, Sam, Peter, Phillip, and Joseph

What an incredibly hard thing it is to get six grandchildren, two who live hundreds of miles away, to be in one picture! I think this is the only one I have. So whether it is a good picture of them or not, I treasure it, as I do them. No one could have prepared me for what is means to be a grandmother, and if they tried I don't remember it having much impact on me.

Well, now I get it. I see that grandmothers and grandchildren are God's gift to each other. Just when I was feeling a little over the hill, here come sincere little people who truly like me no matter what, don't care about the "crinkles", think I'm worthy to be Lucy when we go to Narnia, Gandolf when we are in the Shire, Little John in Sherwood Forest, or Flounder when we go under the sea.

Grandchildren keep our hearts young. I cherish the opportunity God has given me to put whatever good things I can into them. I love the quote that says "Nobody can do for little children what a grandmother can--sprinkle a little star dust over their lives." But truly, it is Sam, Joseph, Tom, Phillip, MiMi and Peter who have sprinkled star dust into my life, and I pray it will never wear off.

"I wish I had the energy my grandchildren have, if only for self defense."

"Blessed be the ties that bind generations."

"Few things are more delightful that grandchildren fighting over your lap."

This is one of those days we've been waiting for!

2008-08-31T09:37:00.000-07:00

"When you tickle the earth with a hoe she laughs with a harvest."

This morning I felt like laughing myself when we harvested our little pumpkin patch and our purple martin birdhouse gourds. What a joy to stand and relish the brilliant colors that the gourds, the zinnias and the pumpkins have delivered to our little corner of the world! We had hoped for at least 4 pumpkins so Tom, Phillip, MiMi and Peter could pick one out, but we even have enough for a pie or two.

This little harvest makes all the mosquito bites worth it. Next year when the purple martins come and make homes in our birdhouses, the mosquitoes will be the their entree, and we will have the satisfying experience of sitting in the evening and watching the martins swoop over our garden, dining on our sworn enemies.

"A thankful receiver bears a plentiful harvest." William Blake

"Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant." Robert Lewis Stevenson

Six grandchildren later

2008-08-29T09:53:00.000-07:00

Eleven years ago, when our first grandchild was born, I decided to paint his portrait when he turned three. Little did I know that I would paint five more little three year olds in hopes of freezing on canvas a tiny slice of their fleeting childhoods.

Sam, filling his bucket with sand, Joseph climbing rocks on the beach, Tom waging dinosaur battles, Phillip sailing the pirate seas, Peter setting up animal kingdoms, and MiMi snuggling with her "blankies"--these moments are captured and hanging on the walls of their homes.

I am grateful for the gift God has given me to paint. A sweet reward is that I had to study the tilt of their head, the special curve of their nose, the nape of their neck and the line of their little arms and legs, and because of that I will carry in my mind as well as my heart the way our precious grandchildren looked at three years old.

If anybody in our family decides to have another baby, let's hurry up, I'm not getting any younger!

Someone said, "A grandmother is a mother with a second chance." Ever grateful for that!

Sunday afternoon at home

2008-08-24T16:32:00.001-07:00

I wrote a story once about our home, trying to express my feelings about the joy it gives me to be here, and the power of influence a home can have on anyone who walks in its doors. I sent this little story to a home magazine and got back a letter that said (in essence) that it was the "corniest" piece that they had ever received. From that I simply surmised that they had never been happy at home and didn't have a clue what I was talking about.

Goethe said "He is happiest, king or peasant, who finds happiness in his home." Today has been one of those "finding happiness" days for me. Phil and I watered and did a "10 minute tidy" in the garden. Butterflies swarmed the flowers as I lined up our first pumpkins on the picnic table, admiring them like grandchildren in a school pageant.

Someone said that fall is the best sniffing season, and today I sniffed to my heart's content that special smell that only fall can waft. After a shower and a great lunch of left-overs, we grabbed our books and snuggled down to read and "rest." We call it rest, but really it is drifting into a very deep and welcomed nap that can last for hours. We've pretty much got this rest thing down to a science. I awoke to the long-awaited sound of little splashes of rain in the old birdbath outside the window on my side of the bed. RAIN! we have prayed for it, and I nearly slept through it!

Home is where these very small everyday occurrences take on a much larger significance. These are the moments you need to squeeze all the joy from. I read today that home must not be just comfortable, but comforting. I take that statement to heart and challenge anyone who may happen upon this little "ode to home" to thrill at the possibilities of this truth.

I see that loving my home puts me in very good company:

"I had rather be on my farm at home than be the emperor of the world." George Washington

"There is nothing like staying at home for real comfort." Jane Austen

"Love begins by taking care of the closest ones--the ones at home." Mother Teresa

old clothes, a tried and true friend

2008-08-21T13:16:00.000-07:00

Thoreau said, "What I am must make you forget what I wear." When I first read that, I knew in a flash that we would have been good friends, sharing the same opinions on fashion, or the lack thereof. My first inclinations were confirmed when I found this quote, "Distrust any enterprise that requires new clothes." What a soul mate! Couple that with a shared love of nature and we could have tramped unselfconsciously around Waldon Pond together- both with our out- of- date hairdos and wearing whatever we wanted, regardless of its age or condition.

Do clothes "make the man?" I truly don't think so. I must admit that if I were a size 10 or smaller, and could wear anything without taking into consideration all the criteria each garment must pass in order for me to feel presentable in it, you might think that I have adopted this passion for old and comfy stuff because the new and stylish stuff doesn't do a thing for me. I beg to differ. My too big blue and white pinstriped shirt, splattered in paint (I am an artist), washed to an incredible soft state, and perfectly suited to match any pair of old pants, does something for me. When I put it on, I feel empowered to deal with the task at hand, however messy, however genteel.
Whether I'm digging in dirt, or napping in my bed, that shirt fits the bill. I now wear it to the grocery, not caring, as in years past, what others may think. I feel productive in it, at least I look like I have accomplished a whale of a lot of stuff while I had it on.

I'm thrilled to have found that many others hold the same opinion as I. I have included some really wonderful quotes to substantiate my claims. Old clothes, a simple pleasure that I am ever grateful for.

A few great quotes

"Most of us are ashamed of shabby clothes and shoddy furniture; let us be more ashamed of shabby ides and shoddy philosophies. It would be a sad situation if the wrapper were better than the meat wrapped inside." Albert Einstein

"People seldom notice old clothes when you wear a smile." Mildon

"If honor be your clothing, the suit will last a lifetime, but if clothing is your honor, it will soon be threadbare." Arnot

and remember: "Never wear anything that panics the cat." O'Rourk

2008-08-20T14:14:00.001-07:00

Breaking out the old soup pot

2008-08-20T13:15:00.000-07:00

soup quotes for soup lovers

Do you have a kinder, more adaptable friend in the food world than soup?...You don't see steak hanging around when you're poor and sick, do you?"

"A first rate soup is more creative than a second rate painting."

"Worries go down better with soup."

Fall is in the air, even though it is 90 degrees outside. The leaves are crunchy, the air is dry, the light has changed and the mornings are a promise of things to come--cool and motivating.

Walking into the grocery store yesterday with 15 dollars in my pocket, I had a definite culinary shift in my thinking....I grabbed the little basket (designed for the little spender) and headed for the produce aisle. One potato, one turnip, one onion, 2 carrots, and four or five things later, I zipped out of the store with vegetable soup on my mind, and a balance of one dollar and thirty six cents.

When we have that first "pot of something" at our house in the fall, there is no turning back to cold, lightweight fare that leaves you longing for something more....
"Soup is the song of the hearth..and home", said Louis De somebody. A hot bowl of it by the fireside (even I think it is a little too soon for a fire) a little music or an old movie and you have the makings of a mighty fine evening. It doesn't hurt to have a fellow soup-phile to share it with.
Ummmm. lets see...potato cheese, split pea with ham, 15 bean, corn chowder, chicken noodle, beef stew, gumbo, clam chowder, cream of tomato, chicken tortilla, broccoli cheese, cream of chicken..........

Beethoven said, "Only the pure in heart can make a good soup."
(I've checked my heart, and I think he needs to stick to his music)

quote of the day

2008-08-18T07:24:00.000-07:00

"The grace of God frees us from having to pretend that we are better than we are"... Larry Crab

Oh, how grateful can one be for that truth? Having spent the bulk of my life trying to be better than I am, I am blown away with the idea of such a love that offers such freedom. He is righteous, He is beautiful, He is in control, He is faithful.....I just have to believe in Him...Sister Mary Corita said, "To believe in God is to have a Him to be in."
I am so grateful today that I have that Him to be in. She also said "to believe in God is to die and not be embarrassed." Wow, that'll make a girl smile.

ever grateful

our new flag

2008-08-17T15:18:00.001-07:00

wonderful sunrise quotes

2008-08-17T13:26:00.000-07:00

" There will never be a night or problem that could defeat sunrise or hope." Bern Williams

"Watching the clock is not the same as watching the sunrise." Sophia Pierce

"The Lord has turned all our sunsets into sunrises." Clement of Alexandria

"What is the good of your stars and trees, your sunrise and the wind, if they do not enter into your daily life?" E.M. Forster

"The sunrise never failed us yet." Celia Thaxter

early riser's reward

2008-08-17T11:53:00.000-07:00

The greatest joys come from the most simple of pleasures....check out this sunrise(free for the pauper and millionaire alike). Our screened porch is a source of great joy to Phil (my beloved husband) and me. From well-worn chairs we jump to grab our bird book to identify a newcomer to our feeders. The latest thrill has been watching the sun catch the waving American flag Phil hung on the big maple down at our garden.

I thank God everyday that He made me the type who gets alarmingly high on the smallest of things...you know, like swarming butterflies hovering over our zinnias, a tomato sandwich for breakfast, a goldfinch munching a sunflower head, the tiny beginning of a pumpkin, watching the leaves way up at the top of the trees wiggle in the breeze when the rest of the tree is still, the thrill of hearing my grandchildren call me "Mimom", watching for a purple martin to swoop down for mosquitoes (hate mosquitoes) and the thrill of that first cup of coffee sitting down at the garden on my much loved picnic table. I could go on and on, and, never fear, I will. I am a very blessed woman, and I never want a day to go by that I don't say it out loud.